An absolutely devastating exhibition of the striker's art by Nigel Hoyland brought Logica their first victory of the season. Hoyland equalled the club's individual scoring record by blasting all six goals in Logica's emphatic 6-3 victory away to newly promoted Wandsworth Town. The only other occasion that such a feat has been achieved was in October 1990, when the legendary Keith Sidaway netted six goals in a 9-1 trouncing of Hampstead SDA. This was not the only Lag's record to fall, as Mark Abbott missed his first ever penalty for Logica in an eleven year spot-kicking career.

Hoyland combined pace, aggression and lethal finishing to tear the Town defence to shreds. After spending much of the first ten minutes holding a lively Wandsworth attack at bay, Logica pounced on the break in traditional fashion. Jon Clarke sprang the home side's offside trap to feed Abbott's well timed run down the left. The striker advanced to the bye-line before picking out Hoyland's run to the far-post with a deep cross. Hoyland placed his header perfectly back across goal and just inside the far post, and Logica had an unaccustomed early lead (1-0).

Minutes later Logica had a golden opportunity to double their lead. Tim Wood was clambered upon by two Town defenders as he tried to head the ball in the penalty box, and the referee pointed to the spot. Abbott collected the ball and placed it carefully as he had done thousands of times before. He ran up and side-footed the ball, duly sending the keeper the wrong way, again as he had done thousands of times before. This time however, the ball veered high and to the right, and ended up in the allotments some distance behind the goal, where it nestled rather forlornly amongst some ageing turnips. Abbott had missed a penalty. An air of stunned silence was audible for a split second. Then the game restarted. As soon as Yuri Geller's alibi has been verified, a law-suit will be winging it's way to Puma head-quarters in relation to the new boots worn by Mr Abbott for the first time in this game.

As Abbott delved into the inner reaches of his desolate soul for the next ten minutes, Hoyland busied himself with completing his hat-trick. A crisp five-man move found Tim Wood playing a superb first-time pass into the path of the anticipating Yorkshireman, who rifled home low into the corner from the edge of the box (2-0). A dazzling run by Hoyland himself paved the way for the third. Having beaten a few men himself, he laid the ball off to the tormented Abbott who quickly flicked it left-field on to the marauding Burdett. His shot was blocked, but he reacted quickly to collect the rebound and cross for Hoyland to bullet a header that the keeper got a hand to, but couldn't keep out (3-0).

As half-time approached, Hoyland's pace and anticipation found him on the end of another defence splitting pass, this time from Clarke. Again he advanced clear of the trailing Wandsworth defenders, and clinically beat the keeper with a side-footed shot (4-0). In the unlikely event that the second half might degenerate into a foregone conclusion, Logica conceded a sloppy goal just before the break. Having failed to clear a corner, Spence misjudged a shot which he thought was going wide, but which in fact hit both posts before finally going in (4-1). This was bad luck for Spence, who minutes earlier had made a miraculous save of Gordon-Banks-1970-Against-Brazil proportions, somehow getting an outstretched hand to a point-blank volley and recovering to catch the rebound high above his head.

If that wasn't enough Logica conceded a second goal minutes into the second period. A Town forward turned his man from a throw-in and scored with a low shot (4-2). This is where Logica usually wobble, and the opposition were now noticeably more confident. Legs suddenly felt tired and possession was surrendered via panicked clearances. Abbott wandered off in an introspective daze, to be replaced by Fleming, and Reeves collapsed in a cramp-ridden heap during a characteristic darting run that had accounted for three defenders at the moment of pain, to be replaced by Mainwaring. Having got rid of these two old dodderers, Logica set about regaining control. Cue Hoyland again. A sublime back-heeled pass from Jon Clarke played in the man with golden boots, and eschewing all other options, he decided to fire home from a difficult angle (5-2).

The nerves jangled again as the home side scored a fluke third goal via a mis-hit cross that looped over the head of Spence and in just under the bar, but Wandsworth were not going to get out of jail. Logica continued to defend stoutly, and with just seven minutes left Hoyland completed his double hat-trick as he latched onto a long pass and slid the ball past the advancing keeper (6-3).

A truly remarkable individual scoring performance, but one which should not eclipse totally a splendid team effort. The back three were again solid, and Clarke, Wood and Gautam in the midfield worked hard to win the ball and keep possession intelligently. Burdett and Fleming fulfilled the difficult wing-back roles with gusto, and Mainwaring added an extra bite when he came on. Even Reeves played uncomplainingly and with no little skill in an unfavoured wing-back role for an hour. If only we could find a decent penalty-taker....