Despite the blistering summer heat, Scott Fleming, The Wise Supremo, was suitably honoured with a Testimonial Match played between The Pups and The Lags that demonstrated some of the finer footballing arts. Three times The Pups took the initiative with well taken goals, but three times The Lags fought back with well crafted equalisers. At the end of the match, honours were even, and the champagne flowed in recognition of Fleming's superb contribution to the club over the last three years.

The heat was almost unbearable. There was not a cloud in the sky and the sun beat down incessantly on this, the hottest day of the year. New Supremo Groom had wondered why he had been able to book the Battersea Park Astroturf pitch at such short notice. The match just finishing on the neighbouring pitch, between an England XI and a Mad Dogs XI, gave some clue. The Lags felt the conditions would favour them, as they are unable to run around in any weather.

The Pups meanwhile were also full of confidence. Three weeks pre-season training preceded by an impressive showing in the Manchester World Cup had left them bordering on the confident. Despite the enforced absence of head coach Dav Gautam, and a training injury to Craig Taylor, The Pups were able to field a strong side. They even had a keeper! New boy Steve Morgan had happened across Groom in some seedy late night drinking establishment, and had foolishly let slip that he was both a goalkeeper and in search of a Sunday League team to play for.

The optimistic youngsters also noted that The Lags were missing the likes of Spence, Clarke, Reevaldo, Johninho, Venis, Grassie, Woolhouse, Lambert, McHattie, Duggan and of course anything resembling a goalkeeper. Spurred by these observations, Groom's new charges started at a pace, which, whilst highly ill-advised in a temperature of 42°c in the shade, did yield them a goal within minutes of the kick-off. A sharply taken throw-in caught Zurawski still readjusting his knotted hankie, and Hatton Major was able to take the ball in his stride and smash an unstoppable shot past Abbott from 12 yards (1-0).

The Lags took longer than usual to get into their stride. The Pups had by far the better of the opening exchanges, but could not add to their lead despite forcing a number of corners. Then, out of the blue, The Lags equalised. Keiran Toman, heartily welcomed back into the Logica footballing fold, took one of his trade-mark long throw-ins. Richmond had timed his run to perfection, taking defenders with him, and rising to flick on a header to Sidaway sneaking in on the blind-side. The big Geordie still had plenty to do, but showed great technique in volleying a bouncing ball right into the corner past a helpless Morgan (1-1).

The goal galvanised the more experienced of the two sides, and The Lags had their best period of the game, constructing some excellent passing moves. Nige McManus had adjusted (down) to the pace of the game, and began to impose his own brand of dextrous wizardry on proceedings. A series of intricate and pacey dribbles had the Pups at sixes and sevens, and it was only McManus' unselfishness in the final third that stopped the Lags taking the lead. Despite McManus' vigorous pre-match 'Hole Merchant' denial, one could not help pigeon-holing the new boy as a kind of Reevaldo with pace.

Typically, The Lags best period concluded with The Pups snatching the lead. Some defensive apathy allowed Hoyland to break through, and a clinical side-footed finish from this deadly striker gave the exposed Abbott no chance once more (2-1). The Lags are made of stern stuff, lots of it, and it wasn't long before they equalised again. Mackinney volunteered to don the gloves, and Abbott's first significant contribution was to whip in a dangerous cross from the right touchline. Morgan came out to try and claim but fumbled, and Richmond reacted quickly to tuck home the loose ball (2-2).

With the interval just minutes away, The Pups incredibly took the lead for a third time. A good break down the right exposed the Lag defensive cover, and when Hoyland received the ball in the penalty area, he was able to lay it back to an unmarked Jon Clarke. The Scotsman did not panic, and carefully picked his spot just inside the far post with a low shot (3-2).

The second half was predictably played at a slightly slower pace as the sun began to take control. The Lags in particular seemed to struggle to achieve anything above a brisk stroll, although notable exceptions were Sidaway, Zurawski and McManus, all of whom managed to maintain an impressive work-rate to the last.

The Pups had the majority of play, and carved out a number of respectable chances. Wood was pulling the strings in the middle of the park, and Jeff Hatton impressed greatly in an advanced role. Indeed if Hatton's finishing had even come close to matching the quality of his approach play, The Pups would have been out of sight within the hour. After scoring a beautiful goal inside two minutes, Hatton had proceeded to blast a sequence of shots from varying distances and angles over the bars at both ends of the ground. He then headed a great Sutton cross weakly wide from six yards, before contriving to miss an even simpler volley from even close range. This was terrible luck for The Pups, whose dominance increased as the game wore on.

It does however demonstrate that goalscoring is the hardest footballing art of them all. And nobody could pontificate longer on this particular subject than the legendary Sidaway. Just as the game seemed up for The Lags, re-enter a Legend with something to prove. Picking the ball up just inside The Pups' half of the field, Sidaway strode forward purposefully. Eschewing the tempting options of Abbott to his left and McManus to his right, Sidaway simply twatted the ball into the top corner from fully thirty yards (3-3). It was a screamer, and gave new keeper Morgan no chance. More important still, it answered the numerous critics who had written the Geordie off as a spent force after the Manchester debacle. And, of course, it maintained The Lags unbeaten record against the younger generation.

TEAMS:
Pups: Steve Morgan, Mainwaring, P.Hatton, Trovato, Fleming, J.Clarke, Wood, J.Hatton, Marsh, Hoyland, Sutton. Subs: Groom, Denyer. Scorers: J.Hatton, Hoyland, J.Clarke.
"If Selected..." Pup of the Match: Jeff Hatton.

Lags: Abbott, Oliver, Zurawski, Khan, Dick, Toman, Richmond, D.Mackinney, Read, McManus, Sidaway. Subs: None. Scorers: Sidaway(2), Richmond.
"If Selected..." Lag of the Match: Keith Sidaway.

Referee: Mr Craig "Jack" Taylor.