's pre-season clarion call to forget the opposition and play our own game was taken a tad too literally. A Logica side lacking both a large swathe of star names and any hint of match fitness paid scant attention to our impressive opponents, and also put in a performance that would not have looked out of place in that wretched autumn of 2003. Broadway were allowed to put on quite a show, helping themselves to half a dozen goals before the interval, after which some evidence of home pride limited them to just two more.

After some meticulous hard work to prepare for a season that many fans are hoping will culminate in a long-awaited promotion, was perhaps a little too relaxed on the morning of the first game. He was up and about early doors, and after a light and doubtless healthy breakfast, he settled down with a little light reading (a thick tome appraising the impact of Abraham Lincoln on nineteenth century American politics, since you ask) and a fag. An hour or more later, deeply immersed in the causes of the American Civil War, it suddenly struck him that there was a reason he had got up so early. "It was only then that I remembered we had a match today!" chuckled our .

The rest of the team took longer to wake up. After twenty minutes of fairly non-descript football by both sides, in which Logica struggled to get anywhere near the visitors' goal, Broadway grabbed the lead. was donning the Logica number one jersey for the first time since April 2003, and got down smartly to parry an awkwardly bouncing shot. A Broadway striker was first to react, but again blocked the effort, only to see the ball bundled home at the third attempt [0-1].

With two competitive games under their belts, and now a goal to the good, Broadway ran riot against a sluggish Logica side for the rest of the half. A long ball found two unmarked visiting strikers queuing up to flick over [0-2], before a vicious corner was glanced home at the near post [0-3]. suffered a painful shoulder injury that saw him side-lined for five minutes, but Broadway politely waited for him to return before banging in three more goals [0-6].

The whole team showing was poor, with a complete lack of movement and physical aggression compounded by some statuesque reaction times. Debutante could count himself a little unlucky to be substituted at the break, for there were plenty of candidates and he made some good interceptions in right midfield. His replacement was the other debutante, , who impressed with some pace and aggression down the right flank and was probably the only bonus of an otherwise miserable morning.

Logica showed a little more spirit in the second half and at least tried to make it harder for Broadway to score. was notable for some well-timed tackles, whilst exemplified the aggression needed by his colleagues as he uncompromisingly fouled a Broadway midfielder with his nose. Unfortunately the unstemmable flow of nasal blood that resulted forced him off the field.

There were other improved performances, including who never gave up the fruitless chasing, but Broadway still dominated proceedings even if they were restricted to just two more goals [0-8]. The most telling statistic was that the visiting keeper was not called upon to make a single save, a late free-kick that flew a yard the wrong side of the post the sole threat on the Broadway goal.

As left the Stade to return to the emancipatory delights of the Gettysburg Address, he at least had some free and sound advice for his charges. "As far as I'm concerned, we must just forget about this morning's game. Our season starts next Sunday." We can only hope that it does.