It was a season that encompassed much frustration and no little fixtural farce, and culminated in the retirement of Logica Football Club's longest serving Supremo. The elements, the Football Gods and that most cruel of mistesses, the Sportsmans League Fixture Computer, all conspired in equal part to leave the team without a competitive game for a whole month or longer on three separate occasions. This lack of regular games found Logica increasingly struggling to raise eleven players as the season spluttered onwards, and a vicious downward spiral ensued as results suffered and enthusiasm waned further as a result. When the business end of the season arrived all too suddenly, was called upon to administer one last dose of managerial inspiration to his remaining handful of battle-weary charges for a decisive last match.

As ever, the campaign had begun bathed in sunshine and optimism. Two convincing pre-season friendly victories against Victoria and Senior Amateur Reserve side Kensington Athletic had some of the shrewder pundits tipping Logica for promotion. But the season proper found Logica's recent Achilles heel, an inability to turn dominance into goals, being punished ruthlessly. The tone was set as the team first somehow contrived to lose 1-2 to a poor (and ultimately bottom) Lansdown side on the opening day of the season, before being left to kick their heels for three weeks as first a Cup bye and then a match award against a suspended Old Sergeant team, established the stop-start nature of the season to follow.

The presence of the cameras at the Stade in October inspired the limelight hunters to an impressive 6-2 thrashing of Portman Arms, as If Selected... launched its on-line highlights package in conjunction with media giants the and YouTube. The following week perhaps saw a decisive moment in the season's development. Logica put on probably their best footballing display of the winter, but still came away losing 1-4 to Kew Green, who delivered a stark and ruthless lesson in the importance of clinical finishing. During a gruelling campaign the team would manage just 24 goals, the lowest goals per game ratio in the club's history.

Two contrasting defeats followed. A limp 0-2 defeat to a mediocre SW Alliance team turned out to be a far more demoralising affair than a plucky battle against a brilliant Varsovia team, capped by a quite superb strike from . A flurry of late goals gave the Polish side a 6-1 victory, but Logica could take much from the spirited application displayed against the team who would go on to become Champions without dropping a single point, rattling in 82 goals in their 17 games.

Unfortunately, the team were unable to build on this performance, as first a pedantic referee awarded us our Cup-tie against bogey side Bragança without a ball being kicked, and then Spectra inexplicably failed to raise a team to play us for the second year running (are they frightened of us?!). So it was that we found ourselves in the third round of the Cup without having played a match, whilst two thirds of the points haul that had put us in a comfortable mid-table zone came from match awards. This latter statistic perhaps led to a false sense of security, and the players might have responded better to a desperate and urgent need for points.

There was only one further match in the last two months of the year, and that saw a rusty Logica team unusually fail in its favoured role of David. First Division North Kensington Utd comfortably ended Logica's presence in the Big Ron Cup, with 's second goal of the season a scant consolation. was left with plenty of time over an extended Christmas break to ponder the problems that had seen his team just win one of their meagre six competitive matches thus far.

The new year began in a deluge of fixtures, as the double headers began early doors, and the team played seven fixtures over five consecutive Sundays. Logica would end up playing 8 double headers out of the season's total of 19 matches. Never a form of the game that we have excelled at, those double headers would yield a return of just 3 points out of 24.

The first match of 2007 saw Logica crash 4-2 to lowly Portman Arms despite taking the lead and then pulling back to 2-2. Veteran striker had opened the scoring, which was at least a fitting way to mark his 300th appearance for the Logica club. It was his 189th domestic goal, a reasonable return, but has the man really found nothing better to do on a Sunday morning during the last nineteen years?!

Indeed, despite the apparent lack of matches at times, it was a season dotted with a plethora of personal milestones. The very first match of the season saw the notch up a century of appearanaces for Logica, a landmark that was subsequently equalled by (against Kew Green), (in a long-planned and finally realised appearance in the Fulham double-header) and (which the irrepressible striker marked with a brace of goals in the last game of the season). had made his 100th appearance during the previous campaign, but his second goal against Portman Arms made him only the fourth player in the club's history to score fifty competitive goals on a Sunday morning. And at various points during the season , and all clocked up fifty appearances for Logica.

As increasingly struggled to assemble the full quota of players for a Sunday morning, Logica's fortunes took a decided turn for the worse as they mustered just a single point in that rush of seven matches after Christmas. That came courtesy of a 2-2 draw against SW Alliance, but apart from the 4-2 defeat against Portman, Logica managed just one other goal in those games. had been playing with an increasing number of injuries, which, as well as playing on Saturday, was placing a heavy burden on what were already regularly damaged body parts. Logica's inspirational talisman of the last two seasons wisely decided that an extended rest on Sundays was long overdue, and Logica would play the rest of the campaign with a variety of stand-in centre halves, with and particularly impressive in unfamiliar roles.

By the time the double-header against Welham Athletic came around in mid-March, Logica fans were getting decidedly nervous as their team clung to an increasingly precarious perch just above the relegation zone. Two clubs had folded, including Portman Arms, which had robbed Logica of three points from their meagre total, and a resurgent Welham could draw level with Logica if they claimed all six points. 's team thus desperately needed to win at least one of the matches, and the preceding month of inactivity decided the wisest of gaffers to gamble all on the first game. His charges responded with a gutsy team display that earned a 2-0 win, although one man somewhat unfairly hogged the statistical limelight. In the absence of , the creaking volunteered to don the gloves, and remarkably claimed an assist for 's lethal opener, settled nerves and the destiny of the points with the second goal from the penalty spot with minutes remaining, whilst in between times keeping Logica's only clean sheet of the season.

Predictably Logica were spent by these exertions, and all but conceded the second match. The euphoria of those vital and hard-won three points were short lived as just ten men eventually capitulated the following week to an impressive Spectra side, and Logica were in the relegation zone for the first time during campaign. More spirit and guts went unrewarded in yet another pair of double-header defeats against title-chasing Fulham, and the drop was staring the players in the face. bagged the solitary goal against Fulham, his seventh of the season in just thirteen starts, and enough to land him the Golden Boot.

In response to the increasing list of injuries, retirements, runny noses and weekends away, began to draft in some new blood. was a much needed new centre half, and went on to play nine matches throughout the campaign. After a series of false starts, finally made his debut towards the end of the season, and proved himself a tenacious and intelligent full back. He was joined by fellow Leatherhead World Cup star , who added some bite to the midfield. And , the first product of the scouting network, showed himself impressively adept in a variety of midfield and forward roles, making a significant contribution in five appearances as Logica battled for survival.

The only saving grace was that the team's destiny was still in their own hands. If Logica could beat relegation rivals Old Sergeant in their final match of the season, Division Two football would be guaranteed next season. Despite the magnitude of the match, was once again scrabbling around on the eve of the show-down trying to make up a bare XI. was still suspended after another bout of handbags against Sands End had earned him the second red card of his Logica career, the club's first player to achieve such a distinction. became the eighth player of the season to go in goals, a selfless act that at least put him top of the appearance charts for the second time in three years. It is surely just an incredible coincidence that Logica did not win a single point with between the sticks, the biggest return coming when wore the gloves (4 points in 4 games).

Despite the patched up nature of the side, Logica turned in a superb first half of football to lead 4-0 at the interval. 's career had seemed over when he was forced to undergo serious ankle surgery the previous summer, but the pain and frustration now evaporated as the larger-than-life number nine produced an inspirational display packed with determination and skill in equal measure as he set Logica on their way with the first two goals. Newcomer spectacularly blasted his first goal for the club, and even managed to find the onion bag as the home side could for once be described as rampant. It wouldn't be Logica without a few nervous moments, of course, but after Sergeant had pulled a couple of goals back, capped a superb individual season with a fifth goal to see Logica safely across the finishing line in seventh place.

The excessive stress of his seventh season at the helm finally persuaded the seemingly effervescent that enough was enough. That dramatic last-day victory had ensured at least that his copy-book remained unblotted: if the longest reign in the club's history had failed to land any silverware, it had simultaneously steadfastly avoided the drop. Given that Logica had been relegated twice in the three seasons prior to the Norfolker's appointment, such stability was no mean feat.

But such a simple statistical summary does not do justice to 's achievements. What might appear from the terraces a glamorous job is in fact mostly about tedious hard graft and endless hassle. Monday night league meetings, organising opponents and referees, a raft of financial spreadsheets, media commitments, and the inevitable cry-off calls late on a Saturday only begin to hint at the rigours involved. That has combated all these and much more besides for seven years with unquenchable enthusiasm, a smile on his face, a fag in his mouth, and a pint in his hand, is a testament to the great man's character and inspirational leadership.

He has also reinvigorated the social side of the club, re-establishing the hugely popular Annual Awards Dinners, and always prepared to sacrifice a valuable Sunday afternoon at home with some selfless team bonding in the pub. That he has found time between all this to play a significant role in organising many LogicaCMG World Cups defies belief, and goes a long way towards making up for his abysmal grammar and punctuation that has challenged some the finest sub-editors at If Selected Towers.

Logica FC would certainly not be what it is today without the unstinting hard work and enthusiasm of the , and for that everyone at the club is sincerely and unreservedly grateful. We wish him a long and happy retirement from management, and can only hope that, unlike most outgoing Supremos before him, he continues to make himself available to play on a Sunday morning. After all, where else will certain aging strikers be able to cadge a half-time fag?

SEASON AT A GLANCE:
Most Appearances: (18 out of 19 games max)
Golden Boot: (7 goals in 13+1 games)
Players' Player of the Year:
Goal of the Season: vs Varsovia
Football Writers' Player of the Year:
Biggest Victory: 6-2 v Portman Arms (a)
Heaviest Defeat: 0-7 v Charing Cross (h)
Number of Players used: 34
Goals Scored: 24 goals in 19 games (average 1.26 per game)
Goals Conceded: 60 goals in 19 games (average 3.16 per game)
Clean Sheets: One in 19 games (average one every 19.00 games)